Tuesday, May 25, 2010

... Closures ....

Closures or saying farewell to relationships, friendships, our jobs or places that we used to live or just a phase in a life journey is not an easy thing to do. Some would completely ignore this phase and just move on .. some would grief over it and never get to move on emotionally and mentally through physically the person has moved on .... and there are some life me .. who is very particular about doing closures in life before moving on to the next phase and season.

I believe that everything has an beginning and an ending. It is my own principle that when we start well, we have to make sure that we end well. Hence, doing a closure is part of ending well. Usually, a physical farewell or closure is easier .... because we just physically move into another setting physically but if emotionally and mentally we are not connected with our emotions and do a proper closure to it .. sometimes that phase of life or relationship or place where we use to live becomes a baggage that we add into our soul that will remain with us even as we move on.

Doing a closure in a relationship sometimes does not mean saying goodbye forever or the relationship has ended but doing a closure to the relationship is bringing the current state of the relationship to an end ... evaluating it .... appreciating it ... and perhaps if there are things that needs to be talked out or cleared ... be open to discuss and talk about it and hence move on. Moving on simply means that the relationship may go back to how it was always or it moves on to another level or it sort of life falls back to a more basic friendship. No matter what, relationships and friendships are dynamic and it takes a of both parties at the same page to continually grow the relationship/friendship. If one party does not want to do so ... then the relationship goes back to its simplified status. Whatever it may be, closures are points where we can evaluation our friendships.

There were many things that I did to bring my journey in TTC to a close and among those were :

a) Photography and the magazine
Being part of the Grad mag helped tremendously in my closure because I spent a substantial amount of time just to go around TTC and the surroundings of TTC taking photos for the magazine. By taking photos of it .... m not only appreciating the blessings that God gave me in TTC but also capturing them into something that I can bring with me as I journey on.

The last week in TTC was a challenging one ... I recall that many of us do not want to pack up our room because we know that once we pack up - it means the end and a new begining. Some spent their time crying as a form of grieving and closure to this phase .. some went out to different parts of Spore to enjoy it for the last time -- my way of closure was taking pictures of different events and of friends ... spending hours editing each one of them ... and posting it ....

b) The Graduands Retreat
This retreat has been really really helpful to us to do closure to our class. It was the last time that our class could hang out and spent time together officially before we move on. In this retreat we really get to play like crazy .. and by God's grace spent some time to do closures to one another. I had the opportunity of doing closure to 2 particular person ... moving on, I know that my friendship with this two will never be the same again ... :0 .. and committed them to the Lord.

Like Sam said : we fought and disagreed the most as a class and when its time to part, we cried the most as a class. And I thank God for the frienships that came by and innner circle of friends and prayer partners that was added into my life through this journey in TTC ....

c) Graduation Dinner, Closing Service, Closing Lunch with Faculty & Graduation Service
These functions have helped in the process of saying goodbye to the student lifestyle in TTC. It has also given me opportunity to appreciate and thank all those who have supported me through their prayers, emotional and moral support ....

d) Individual Times
During this time, I had either breakfast, lunch or dinner with various people that I have met in TTC and this has helped me to apreciate our friendship and hope that by God's grace we will be able to continue to journey together in spirit and in prayer.

Off course, there was also the overnight cycling and BBQ lunch that I had with GMC friends .... which helped me to do a closure to the pasture that I was in past 1.5 years.

After going through a host of things to do my closure .... I guess a trip a way for awhile is good as I then reconciled the processes emotionally and within my heart as part of my preparation to start a another new season in my life.

So, now .... do you agree with me that closures are good process to have in our lives?


Jebster said...

No need to say goodbye to everything la... can still continue to keep in touch ya!

ing said...

hahaha .. emo person ma ... must do closure ... cos when we keep in touch ... its slightly different setting di .. things will change .. u wil change ... and for some ... we will never be able to keep in touch ma ....