Tuesday, June 29, 2010

Help is Coming ....

Yesterday in City Square, saw an old man ..... 60s buying a cheap silver chain .... I cannot help think who will he get it for ... m sure its not his wife. Such irony of life ... young and old are always in desperate need for romance and love ... and which seems fade through time and toil of life, difficult children, growing children ... many children .. when the waves of change and winds of temptation blows, when new "love" comes knocking at your door ... its hard to hold on to the vow that was made .... its easier to walk away .... if you have not got your foundation rooted in Him and if you have not made God the glue of your relationship ...

Heard a very disturbing news yesterday morning .... my JB Indian sister got divorced .... I have seen this couple go through tough times but I never could imagine that they will end up divorced .... after all, I was away for 3 years and before this, we used to hang out quite often and in less than 2years away from JB, they are divorced.

Over the weekend, met another friend, at 40, is picking up the pieces of life and starting to live all over again .... after a painful and difficult divorce ...

Weddings are always a happy occasion and fun ... but when it comes to living the marriage ... it needs lots of hard work, perseverance, lots of giving ..... dying to self ... and most importantly, God!

So, for those who are facing the challenge of life ... especially in relationship .... .... hang in there ..... God will come thru for u .... help is on the way .... He is there ... waiting for you .... to ask for help .... He will show up when you ask Him ... He will not fail you...

Help is On the WAy (Michael W Smith)

People say that time will heal
But you know, they just don't feel what you feel

Times are hard but God is so good

He's never failed you, and
He said He never would
He see's your tears
He fights your fears


Hold on, help is on the way

He said he'd never leave you or forsake you

Stay strong
Help is on the way
He'd said he'd help you

Just reach out and take his hand


He knows your heart,
He lifts your head
He's always close enough
to hear every word you said

When you're weak,
He said He's so much more
His arm is long enough to reach you where you are
He see's your tears

He fights your fears

Sunday, June 27, 2010

Counting My Blessings .. Naming Them One by One

Yes, I really want to thank God for His provision thus far in the new stage of my life. He really looked after my needs --- off course the first is the desire of giving myself a break after slogging for 3 years ….draining every ounce of brain cell I have … -- yes, I need a holiday! God gave me the most wonderful and great time in Hanoi with great crazy friends …. 5 solid days of just relaxing … Pei Yi keep saying its soooooo good to go back to the room to do nothing, and not going back to finish a paper … she also keep saying ..she has all the time in the world …. Willing to wait for anything … do not have any paper to rush out …. J imagine what studies have turned us to … paper churning machines!

Vietnam is a very beautiful country – still unspoilt by development and massive globalization but it is creeping in. The first impression of the country on the way from the airport to city is – its like China, from the uniform guards almost all over to the red flags to even the buildings and landscape. The buildings are generally narrow, longish and tall. The people – hahhaha … small size. Ah Yi keep saying that she feels like a giant in this land.

Hanoi is a beautiful city – old buildings. There is still a lot of the blend of the new and old. One can see big cars pass by and at the same time, a trishaw or someone on feet selling goods in two big baskets carried on their shoulders. This is a land of motorbikes as well. It looks like the ladies worked very hard. Seem to notice more women around and women doing all the hard work.

The streets are narrow and the road system – hahaha … I cannot make out yet cos a cross junction is not really a cross – the traffic seem to be coming from all angles. The trick to cross the street is to keep walking. The vehicles will know how to avoid you – if you try to avoid the vehicles, you’ll get knock down.

Highly recommend that one must visit Sa Pa if one visits Hanoi. Sa Pa is 9hrs from Hanoi city, 8hrs by train, 1hr by bus from the train station. It’s like going to Cameron Highlands, cold, small town – slightly bigger than Brinchan. The attraction is the tribal native village, the mountains, waterfall, jungle tracks etc. There are quite a lot of tribal village around – and they are HUGE villages, not like Malaysian orang asli villages. Their livelihood – farming – the conventional way …. with their bare hands and help of buffalo. Children as young as 4 years old are already being trained in the farm or at least to carry water or the crops from the stream in the villages. Or when they see tourist in their villages, the children runs to you to push their handmade items, smiling sweetly to you saying, “Buy from me, buy from me”. They know how to speak English to sell and bargain. The people are very kind and simple. When they saw Ah Yi’s knee, many offered help (ice bags, chair to sit on etc) or just rush out to see what’s happening. Challenge : who and how to bring the Gospel to them? There are soooo many of them ….

We also visited Ha Long Bay. It is World Eight Natural Wonder Heritage or something like that – you get to see caves and lime stone mountains / islands. But I still think that southern Thailand’s lime stone mountains/ islands and beaches are still much nicer, especially off Krabi. The caves – I think that the 5 Mulu caves is a match or better than the 2 caves I visited in Ha Long Bay. But the cave that made a very lasting impression on me was the glow worm cave I visited in Rotorua, New Zealand.

I have also got to count the blessing of family and friends. Thank God for keeping my parents strong physically. Mom had 2 falls in one month (one was 3 days just before my convocation and another just couple of days back) and I thank God for His protection and hands on Mom. Thank God for siblings and even nieces and nephews and for all their support …

Coming down to JB to start the new season of my journey, God provided an angel who offered me to share her house with me. It’s a medium cost single storey house – so, something like Tmn Berpadu housing estate. The house has 3 rooms. One room is occupied by all my things I brought back from Singapore and the other my bedroom. I was touched because the angel actually went out to buy a new bed and mattress for me. She refuses to take a single from me for rental! I offer pay the utility bill but it seems its very little. For now, my housing is settled temporarily until the Lord provides my own home where I can house Mom too and any family who wants to bunk in. I believe that He will provide the right one for me, at the right pricing, semi furnished at the right location … . He has never fail me so far.

My car should be coming next week – the sales lady say end of the month. I pray it will be out by then. For the time being, my housemate also offers to drive me around or lends me her car or sometimes I get cars from other friends. Cars are not a problem – I am provided for in this area. I am getting a new car with very minimal “Sdn Bhd” loan --- no, its not from the loan sharks but my own family. But really, it’s a very small sum compared to the price of the car. Isn’t our God great?

Looking back, one month and one week from the date I graduated from TTC, the Lord had been with me … He had been providing and looking into my needs. Yes, I thank Him for all the little little blessings He brings to my life and angels that He sends along my life! And I give thanks to Him, my source of my every need in every situation. Yes, as the Palmist declares, He knows the number of hair that I have because He loves me and I am precious to Him.

Indeed He has not forsaken me in my season of transition and adjustment. My Father always gives the best to me. He provides exactly what my heart desires for …. to the very detail.

So, in the mist of changes, adjustment to new environment, new community of faith, new role and responsibilities that I will be asked to do, my Father is holding me with His righteous hand, He have not forgotten me nor has He forsaken me. He will surely lead me to His path and show me His way, to His everlasting way.

May I yield myself forever to Him so that through me, His name will be known through all nations and His glory to be shines through me!

Saturday, June 26, 2010

Lead Us, Lord to Dream Again

Here we stand

At the crossroads again
Like you said
In time the seasons change

Looking back
We recall the blessing and the pain
But now we turn our heart
s toward
What is still to come
We want to dream again

Lead us Lord
Into a life of fruitfulness
Prepare our hearts to risk again
As we trust

Taking simple steps of obedience we know
That you will lead us Lord

By : Lead Us, Lord (Dream Again) by Brian Doerksen

Found the lyric of this song expresses the cry of my heart (the hearts of our classmates)as we step out of TTC. Guess, as we come to the junction of crossroads of life again and not certain of the future that lies ahead, we cry to God to remind us of His vision that He had given to us when He first called us and led us to TTC.

It not that we have forgotten but sometimes it just that the vision seem so far away … dim ... I guess this is also a prayer asking God to set our hearts on fire again for Him … to once again carry His vision in our hearts with passion. What is a heart without passion and what is a life without a vision? We will stand and stare at the crossroad of life that we have come by, not knowing which turning to take. In order to that the right turning at the crossroad, and the right turning is only God's path for us, I realize that we also need to walk away from the road that we have been traveling on and step into the new road …. we need to be willing to walk away from familiar grounds ...

Many times the road ahead of us at the crossroad that we come by is full of mystery and unfamiliar grounds for us. It's quite scary to travel on a path that is unknown .... imagine to travel on it alone .... But what will carry us through the journey is the passion that God place in our hearts and the vision that He has given us will be lamppost and directional signs that we are on the right track till we reach the destination – the vision is fulfilled. Off course, we must never ever forget the Giver of the vision, He will walk with us ... sometimes He will carry us when we are weak and weary from the challenges of the trip and sometimes, He will walk ahead of us ..... leading us ...

Hab 2 : 3 says the vision though it tarries, wait for it .... it will surely come to pass at the appointed time. We need to wait for our vision to come to pass ... for God to fulfill the visions that He had placed in our hearts.

Oswald Chambers writes that we must live in the inspiration of the vision until it is accomplished. I would like to add that we need to add fire and passion to the inspiration. He warns that when we get too practical we will forget the vision because we will always be rushing to practically accomplishing the vision. Chambers adds that waiting for the vision that tarries is the test of our loyalty to God.

Indeed we need to continually keep the vision that God has first given us burning in our hearts for when the vision is ignited with passion and fire, it will be the light that guide our little steps of faith venturing into the unknown. Our job is to take little steps of faith and it is God’s job then to bring the vision to pass.

Do you have a vision in your heart that God had given you? If you do not have, why don’t you start asking God to give place His vision in your heart? This vision will not only guide you but also give you reason to live, bringing fulfillment in life.

Or you seem to have forgotten the vision that God had given you? Chambers say that if we lose the vision, we alone are responsible and the way we lose it is by spiritual leak. If you are in the category, we need to take stock of our lives again to see where the leak is. The vision that had gone dim will be bright once again when God and His Kingdom is once again the first in our hearts and life.

Renew your passion and vision as you step out and live by FAITH!

Friday, June 25, 2010

"Lead Us, Lord!"

“Lead us, Lord!” Was the theme that our class choose as our theme as we leave the comfort zones of TTC and step out into Ministry. This morning, I went through the magazine again .. reading each article again by the Board and lecturers … I was touched, encouraged and strengthened … yes, I must have gone thru the articles tons of time when I was working on the magazine but no matter how many times I read them, the Word of the Lord and the articles always seemed to minister in a special way. This morning, it did again.

Yes, it was the cry of my heart, that God will indeed lead me on His path in my next stage of journey. The intent of my heart and my prayer recorded in the magazine :

“In the cross roads of life again, show me Your way, O Lord, teach me Your path and lead me to Your everlasting truth”.

The cry “Lead me, Lord!” had been even more intense as I come back to JB a week ago. Yes, God affirmed and confirmed many times past 8 months that He wants me to come back to JB. Now that I am back in JB, what is next? Only God knows … and my task and responsibility is to find out what He wants me to do, the blueprint that He has for me back home – for my life and His Kingdom at this stage.

It has not been an easy decision to come back but my principle is to obey when God calls and leads. I am willing to where He calls me to go and to do what He wants me to do. Off course one of the main struggle here was language but what Pei Yi said really gave me the breakthrough – she said, we may speak in the most eloquent language and all but if our hearts and attitudes are not right with God and man what is the use of it. To her, what’s key is our hearts and attitude as we serve before God and man. This truth came hard right on my face that I must not make language barrier as an excuse but must continue to work on my relationship with God and with man, and that my heart and conscious must be right before God and man.

To a certain extend, I thank God for placing me in Skudai Faith Methodist because it is at my weakness and great need of language that will drive me in desperation to God as my source of everything ... in ministry because the ministry is His, I am only His channel .... it is not going to be my talents, gifts ... or strength but it will be thru His that I will step in ... I will serve and thru the cracks of my brokenness and weakness, His glory will shine thru me (words given by Paul when I decided to take the step of faith to TTC).

As I look at my classmates, most of us has a weakness that drive us desperate on our knees ... like Paul ... 3 times he asked God to remove the torn in his flesh but God did not. Why? It is to continue to make us humble before God and man, to keep us constantly at the point of desperately needing Him – hence, brings us to our knees. Then, God's grace will be sufficient for us, His power is made perfect in our weakness ... :0 ... in our weakness, we cease to be God and allow God to be God cos we know we cannot anymore ....

Off course I get the pressure all the time all around me -- yes yes ... I must really learn to speak Mandarin ... pray in Mandarin ... preach in Mandarin ..... lead in Mandarin ... worship in Ma

ndarin … the best ... read Mandarin (off course I will by God's grace .. and if He wills) .... Lord have mercy ... I also need time wat .... how to read Mandarin overnight? I am already struggling picking up spoken. I am not really expecting myself to read but if I can express myself and God's words well in Mandarin, I am already happy and very very grateful. It's already a miracle for me ..... and I am sure that those who know me will agree .... it is only God who will make me learn Mandarin and be in a Chinese environment … only God … to a normal mind – I am crazy! I feel like Jesus is speaking the same words He spoke to Peter to me : you will be lead to go places you do not want to go… given a choice, I don’t think I will choose to be in such environment...crazy ah ....

Lead me on Lord ..... and let Your grace be sufficient for me ... Your power be made perfect in my weakness. Sam asked last week if it is a mismatch that I am going back to a full flash Chinese church or it is truly God's direction for me ... in my heart - I am confident that this is where God wants me to be ... for now .....

So, what does my mentors and teachers has to say about this?

To pray, “Lead me Lord” is literally asking for trouble, for Jesus never promised a path of roses or one filled with applause or accolades. Instead, He said, “If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take u

p his cross daily and follow me” (Lk. 9:23) and “any of you who does not give up everything he has cannot be my disciple” (Lk. 14:33). To pray “Lead me, Lord” is not to say “Le

ad me, Lord, on the safe and comfortable path I have chosen” but rather “Lead me, Lord, on your path, and give me grace

to walk on it no matter what.”

When the Lord reinstated Peter into ministry, He told him that others will “lead you where you do not want to go” and then commanded him, “You must follow me” (Jn. 21:18,22). To have to go where you do not want to go is never easy. But to commit yourself to follow Jesus is to be willing to go where He goes, through the cross and the empty tomb. The prayer “Lead me, Lord” can only be prayed effectively if it is accompanied with dying to self. As Origen said, “Those who have not denied themselves cannot follow Jesus.”

Bishop Dr Robert Solomon

Prayer by Lorraine Kimble : “ Lord Jesus, I will go where you want me to go. I will say whatever you want me to say. And I will do whatever you want me to do…. Help me to have the courage to follow you wherever you lead. I want to be obedient

There will be challenges and there will be difficulties but remember - God will be right there with you. He will not lead you through rough terrains without providing you with a pair of good shoes nor will He forsake you before the journey is complete.

Bishop Terry Kee

“Keep close and be focused on Christ and Him crucified” (1 Cor 2:2) … be of comfort, He not only leads but also He perfects (Heb 12:12). Let Him lead!

Bishop John Chew

"Those who pray this prayer will no doubt encounter difficulties. They will no doubt face many struggles, many of which are the result of the conflict between their prideful ambitions and the will of God. But those who live this prayer will experience the joy of service. As they live surrendered lives they will be constantly surprised by the grace and love of the One who called them."

Dr Roland Chia

To utter authentically ‘Lead us, Lord’ is to be truly humble, for it acknowledges that we cannot proceed on the basis of our own resources, talents or experience. We can never say, ‘Been there, done that, and the decision’s a breeze’. Such complacent words are often the prelude to a mighty failure. God’s ways are always higher than our ways.

Dr Tan Kim Huat

“Lead Us, Lord!” This is essentially a prayer, a supplication to God to guide you to the place he wants you to be. It is also an expression of submission – you consent to forgo your own plans and dreams to

follow God’s.

Dr Leow Theng Huat

Where will you be led, and where will you go?

May the Spirit of God lead you and may you always follow, whether beside refreshing streams of water or through dry barren deserts. And may you always trust that “in all things God works for the good of those who love him” (Romans 8:28).

Dr Gordon Wong

To pray the prayer, "Lead, O Lord", is to relinquish control over where one should go and how one should go about getting there. It is, in short, a decision to desist from our natural impulse to determine direction and destination.

And why not, considering our Lord's proven and impeccable record in leading his people?

Dr Mark Chan

"… as disciples who follow the Lord, a day will not pass without you interceding, ‘Lead us, Lord."

Dr Ngoei Foong Nghian

So, am I on the wrong track in my journey? Is it a mismatch? Off course NOT! I am exactly where He wants me to be, doing what He wants me to do! There is always a cost in following Jesus, a cross to carry – for my, my cost is dying to self and my cross that I need to carry on my ‘Calvary road’ is language ..... Someday soon will come I will experience resurrection in the area!

Meanwhile, to all those in the same situation as I am ..... be strong in the Lord ... the God who had called you will be faithful till the end and will surely enable you!

Tuesday, June 15, 2010

The Fading Of One Generation

Last Sun, 6 June 2010, Aunty went home to be with the Lord peacefully at 10:27pm. She was 67years old. Aunty is the youngest from Mom's side and was born during World War 2 .... everyone in the family babied her since she was the youngest. She was showered with lots of love .... the brothers who went to the fields to work will race each other home after a hard day's work ... the winner will get to carry the fat cute baby!!! Such simple life ...

Mom come from a huge poor family of 11 siblings .... 7 boys, 4 girls but it is officially known that they only have 10 sibling because one of the girl was given away as a child bride when she was a little girl. She was either the eldest or second daughter. However, the family who took her in abused her and caused her death. The family came and informed Grandma that her daughter died from falling from the stairs. The real cause of her death is unknown. Since she was given away as a child bride, she no longer belong to the family, hence, she is not counted as a child in the family. In olden days, it is cheaper to give away their daughters as child bride as the dowry is much cheaper and many families cannot afford the dowry. The child will stay with the family as a maid and when the right time comes, she will then be officially given as a wife to the son of the family.

The eldest daughter was given away to my Great Grandma (maternal) to take care because their family was too poor to bring up girls. They keep all their sons but give away their daughters. Hence, when Mom was born, she was much loved by her Mom maybe because of guilt feeling of unable to love and care for the older two daughters. Mom is officially the second daughter. She is known as Nee-Ku to all her nieces and nephews.

My eldest Aunty was brought back into the family in her early teens but she was a rebel. Off course. She has never lived with her family and the feelings of rejection was strong within her. She was later married to a rich man in Nam Pong at the age of 14, Southern of Thailand by my GrandPa. Till the day of her death, she found it hard to forgive her Dad for "selling" her off at such a young age.

Mom has 7 brothers. The eldest was the smartest. He was a teacher and for someone to be a teacher in those days was big deal. But he ran away from home to Singapore because he does not want to marry the child bride that Grand Ma arrange for him. He died during WW2, from the tortures of the Japanese army. The family just got news that he died. There was no body or funeral conducted.

Mom's second brother also ran away from home because he does not want to be associated with the child bride that was given to him. He went off to China and joined the armies there. However, he later returned to Malaysia (Malaya) and set up his own family upon Mom's appeal to him because Grandma was stricken by grief. Mom went to someone in Simpang Ampat to help her write and mail the letter to her second brother.

Mom's third brother died under the hands of the Japanese as well. It seems that he stayed behind though the villagers asked him to run away ..... his reason was -- he could speak to the Japanese. If I am not mistaken, he was accused of secretly giving medical help to the Communist or something like that. He was literally shot to death. His grave is in Simpang Dua but the family was too poor to build him a proper tomb, hence, his grave is unknown to us now.

The 4th brother also went off to China. He was the playful one, or shall I say street smart just after Mom. Mom told us of an incident whereby he told Mom that he would take her for movies (she really wanted to watch movie but was scared to pass by the graveyard in Simpang Dua) but the catch was, Mom was to pay for the tickets as well as a bowl of noodles for him as payment. In those days, Mom held the family's accounts as all the bigger brothers were not around to help manage the family business. Mom and the 4th brother walked to Cathay Cinema from Spg Dua to catch the movie. However, when 4th Uncle wanted to come back to Malaya (the same time as 2nd uncle), he lost his birth cert and could not proof that he was born in Malaya, hence, he never saw parents alive the day he left for China nor did her return for their funeral. He married a beautiful wife in China and had 2 kids but died when he was 49years old from cancer.

Mom's 5th brother lived a flamboyant lifestyle. He died about 5 years ago from colon cancer at the age of early 70s.

Mom's 6th brother inherited the family business and home. He was the most responsible son who loved Grandma a lot. Since he inherited the family home and business, he continued to open his home and showed hospitality and generosity to the rest of his siblings and their children.

Sadly, Mom's youngest brother immediately died in a freak motorbike accident in front of Shell, Kpg Koh shortly after his 1st and 3rd brother died. He was single and young -- perhaps early or mid 20s. After he died, Grandma was bedridden for 1 month because of grief. It was Moses Tay's mom who came and combed her long hair daily and ministered to her.

As you can see, Grandma had a very challenging and difficult life. There is much more story ... perhaps I'll write them and publish it someday. But the life and family dynamics drew her close to God, drove her to her knees to pray for God's mercy for her family. She was an intercessor for her family and society. She was one of John Sung's preaching band and it seems when she prayed for the sick, they are healed.

By mid 1970s, there was only 5 living siblings left from the family of 10. 2nd (at ripe age of 86) and 6th uncle pass away (of heart failure) two years ago in the span of 3 months and now, with Aunty gone (pancreas cancer), Mom is the only sibling left. We literally see one generation fading away before our very eyes ... and it is sad.

Aunty was also an intercessor ..... she goes round praying for all of us ... her family. CK asked, with her gone, who is going to replace her .. who is going to stand in the gap for our family and intercede .... there is many more yet to come to the Throne Room of Grace ... Yes, the Yu family must arise to receive the baton and carry of the spiritual assignment as intercessors .... so far, there is only two from the Yu family who are serving God - one full time, one part time. Yes, I am serving the Lord full time and my calling is tied to my spiritual heritage from Yu family as well as Ting family and I carry the surname Ting. For this reason, I still believe that my generation of Yu family has to arise to take over .... and to prepare the next Yu family generation to continue to carry the baton before it completely fade away....
We really thank God for preserving Mom and keeping her strong. Yes, her work is not done yet ... and I pray that God will continue to keep her strong until His work for her is done!

Monday, June 14, 2010

... Sadly ... this is my Homeland... HIDUP RAKYAT MALAYSIA!!!

Guess I am still adjusting to living in Malaysia after being away for 3 short years ... and I did not go far .... it was just across the river ... but I tell you there is a host of difference just living across the river!!! As part of the adjustment .... allow me to lament over the bad situation of my beloved Homeland. But I am not only lamenting without a cause .... in my lament, I am calling ALL Rakyat who loves Malaysia to arise and start seriously pray for our Beloved Land!

1) NO WATER!!!!!!
We live in 21st century and how can no water still be an issue???? I really really really really cannot compute and understand how come this problem still exist in our time and age of technology???? Faint!!

I remember growing up in my kampung and we only got water and electric supply in mid 1970s ..... our old house has a well in our house ... we will draw water from it to drinking, washing and cooking. In the estate houses, they have a common well that the Indian community will go to for water supply and in the Malay Kampung, they also have one or two common well. But off course, the Malay Kampung has a little river at the back that they can also do their washing there. The river just disappeared in the name of development .... When water was supplied to our kampong .. it was a big thing .. yes ... our government was very good .... they have worked hard to help its Rakyat and give development to our Land, helped us in our problems and eased our burdens!

When I started working in 1990s in KL, I lived in section 10, PJ. Water was a problem there when it comes to hot dry seasons (month of Mar - Jul/Aug). The reason was ... the water dams/lake is drying up, so there was water rationing. I recall those days where the water tank truck will come (it looks like the same tank that was used to collect/suck poo from houses last time) by in the evenings and all of us will get our pails out to collect water to be used for the day. I clearly recall that this situation was big news and hit headlines in the press ... so the Government promised to solve this problem. In those days, when there is no water supply, there was announcement in the press (major papers in different language) and even house drops to inform us and prepare us.

Sadly, today ... my dear sister still live in the 1980-1990s era .... still living in fear of no water supply!!!! They cant seem to find solution to solve this problem even after 20 years!!! And worst of all, there is NO notice that water is running low ... they are doing maintenance work etc ..... you just got to anticipate that there will not have water anytime!!! No explanation ... nothing ..... even when we call the hotline to complain ... they just have the tidak apa attitude ... they can't be bothered ... and I don't blame them ... why should they be bothered when the owners and heads of their company cant be bothered? What kind of system is this????

What's happening in the system .... think the sad answer is ... nothing happened to the system for the past 20 years!!! It just froze in time!! Yes ... the system did change physically .... SM told me that they "swasta-kan" the water supply in Seremban for better service etc ... that happen like 2 years ago maybe .... but look .... the same water problem still persist even they went public ... there was no improvement in the water supply or its servuces but increase in the water bill!

Someone is just nicely earning a huge cut from this deal and company and cheating the Rakyat by not delivering its services ..... its so sad ... HIDUP RAKYAT!!!! We need to arise and pray against this sad situation ..... pray that God will remove the irresponsible people and close down companies that is cheating the Rakyat ... Lets pray against those who oppress the righteous and take bribes and deprive the poor of justice in the courts.(Amos 5:12) ... and let justice roll on like a river, righteousness like a never-failing stream through out our beloved Land! (Amos 5:24). Pray for God to have mercy on our beloved Land!

Dear all, I am calling for ALL Rakyat to take this situation seriously and start praying seriously ... because I cannot imagine the condition in the future if we cannot have access to clean water. What we are doing today will impact the livelihood of our future generations .... our children and grandchildren. We need to wake up from our slumber land and start seriously to pray for God to change our nation!!!

Frankly, I have never ever encountered water problem when I was living across the river for the past 3 years. This is why ... it really cannot masuk my akal how come my Beloved Homeland is sadly like this ..... Moreover, when it rains .... my friends from my Homeland and I will automatically switch off our computers and pull out all electrical plugs. And my dear Ah Yi (clustermate from across the river-land) ... will laugh at us (Lily and I) asking us which third world country we come from, which century we live in .... have we not heard of systems like the lightning arrester .. ai .... what can we say ..... this is the sad truth .... until and unless we arise to start praying for God to visit every leadership and governing body with justice and righteousness ....

2) Public Transport - the system error or just bad attitude??
It was a HUGE drama coming to Jb from Seremban by public bus yesterday ..... I have not be traveling by public bus in my Sban-JB/Spore trips past 1.5years because it was not convenient from Spore .... plus Airasia ticket is cheap is we buy the ticket way in advance ... which I normally do because my dates are quite fixed.

In the past, I have always traveled by Plusliner because I felt that this is the best bus company ... the buses are well maintained and relatively new and the are very reliable in their timing. But to my horror, I discovered that this company is not as good as I thought it was.

First, the girl who sold me the ticket did not inform me that I got to take the bus from Terminal 2 and not Terminal 1 ... (for someone who has not taken bus past 1.5years, this is very important information) through I stared at the ticket for sometime cos it looks slightly different. Off course it was my mistake to assume that boarding is from Terminal 1 and did not read the boarding venue in fine print.

Secondly, when I arrive at Terminal 1 5minutes before time, their ticketing counter was closed .. there was no notice to say that its boarding in Terminal 2. I walked round the terminal until 1 day saw me to inform me that boarding is in T2 and there will be a free shutter bus to T2. By the time I got to T2 .... it was 1.45pm .... off course, the bus being punctual has left. I walked around T2 .... there was no ticketing office in sight .... just shops. So, I called SM to pick me up again and send me to T1. When I got to the counter, the lady said that "ooo .... its not me who sold u the tickets, so, I dont know. If you want, you got to buy new tickets". But as I try to talk with her ... she said ... you talk to my boss in T2 .... m like --- can you please call your boss .... can I talk with him on the phone ... she made a call and said .... u need to go to T2 to see my boss. I asked her to write down her boss' name because it sounded an unfamiliar name, she refuse to ....

Anyway, off I went to T2 again .... found out that there was indeed ticketing counter and their office ... in Level1 .... but there was NOT a sign to indicate that there was downstairs .... and when I asked for the boss, the lady in the ticketing counter pointed to the group of Malay guys who was just sitting around chit-chatting ... smoking ....

So, I approached the guys and asked who is XXX..... there were 2 guys wearing Plusliner uniform and the younger man pointed to the older man. The older man looked as if he is ready for a fight. "What's the problem" he asked .... I again patiently explain my situation and asked if there is such a thing of reimbursement or special fare because I missed the bus .... not knowing that it is from T2. He shouted .... "How can anyone not know that the bus is from T2?? (i really felt like a stupid fool that time) We changed to this Terminal 2 years ago ...." So, if you want reimbursement or money ... go look for the lady who sold you the tickets ... it has nothing to do with me!!!" He was loud and rude ..... it was in public. I told him that I never want to pick a fight with him but just want to ask if he could help. Afterall, I already missed my bus, my appointment in JB is in a mess and I was made to run back and forth like a headless chicken past 30minutes ..... Why did the lady send me running to him knowing very well that he cannot help me? Anyway ... I told the older guy who sat arrogantly among the other guys that Plusliner has always been my no 1 choice .... now .... I am totally disappointed with the company and I think they (the workers) bring shame to the company). It's their attitude .... their indifferent and pushing the buck attitude ---sadly ... this is the condition my beloved Homeland. How can we attract tourist and make them feel welcomed and at home with attitude as such. Take for example if I am a tourist from Europe .... have limited English and does not speak Malay .... what trouble I will land myself in ..... and on top of that if I have a plane to catch in Spore .... ooo my ... Lord have mercy on these people .... how to love them as you love them and have compassion for them to share the Gospel with them?

I was so upset and shaken .... the people was unkind and rude to me .... and on top of that, totally no apology ... their attitude sucks .... arrogant ... I could not think straight that I went home. After awhile, I recollected myself and ask SM to send me to the bus terminal to buy another set of tickets again. I was quite determine to get down to JB .... so, I send SM down to buy the ticket ... she bought one .... immediate boarding time ..... hahhaha .... another drama .....

This ticket is from the bus started from Lumut in the morning, then to Ipoh and to Seremban. So, it is from Sban that I board. But imagine those who took the bus from Lumut/Sitiawan ... wow .... it must have been a long journey for the by the time they get to JB. Anyway ... I found my seat and waited patiently for the bus to move out since its suppose to start immediately. Then someone obviously from the bus company got up and took a head count and ask for us to show our tickets. The guys sitting next to me has no ticket and immediately said that that guy who actually traveled from Ipoh has to get down cos he does not have ticket!! HUH??

They double sold seats in Seremban and has to make this guy (who happen to be an Indon) without tickets from Ipoh to get down ... HUH??? I cannot compute what's happening again .... sadly .. this is Malaysian public transportation system ... this is for real ....

After sometime .... the bus driver got on ... and the officer told the bus driver that the guy has no tickets ..... immediately the bus driver say ..... "suruh dia turn-la" (ask him to get down) in a loud voice. This is so embarrassing for the poor Indon guy. Then the bus driver went through his tickets and found a bus ticket which was the Indon guy's.

Suddenly the extra ticket sold was sold, the guy who did not have seat had a seat at the back and when asked ... the driver just said .... oooo .... someone who is suppose to get down at Sban did not .... m like "HUH???" I did not see any guy getting down .... Strange .... really pelik .... people really bully who they think they can bully ....

Sadly, after 20 years, the public transport in Malaysia did not improve .... it is either the same or worst .... or it did improve but the attitude of the workers did not .... so it made no difference. I recall in the 1980s where I take bus to Penang and KL from Sitiawan ... and yes .... I encountering these problems seem to be the norm ... sadly, after 20years ... the same problem still exist ..... is there hope for Malaysia??? HIDUP RAKYAT Malaysia!!! We need to arise and stand together against oppression and injustice towards the poor and needy ... and need to stand in the gap to intercede for God's justice and mercy to visit our beloved land .... if we dont ... who will stand in the gap for us?? If we dont .... imagine our next generation and generations to come .... who shall God send ... if it is not you and I .... on our knees first ....

SM said that she is glad that I will be getting my car soon and this will most likely be my last trip (actually not ... I need to get back to Seremban to pick up my new car) .... I thank God for my car but my heart goes out to those who cannot afford to buy a car and has to rely on public transportation ..... Lord have mercy on them ..... Lord have mercy on Malaysia ...

HIDUP RAKYAT MALAYSIA!!! In Christ we can HOPE against all HOPE ... God will bring HOPE to our hopeless situation if we ask ... and knock ... He will answer us!

Thursday, June 3, 2010

Mom's Sleep Over in A Resort

SM gave me one night stay in Corus Paradise Resort PD as one of my birthday gifts and I decided to share this gift with Mom.

So, yesterday, off we set to PD. Thank you SM & KC for making your car available for me to use.. :0...

Mom was excited cos it has been some time since she last stayed in the hotel. The last time was perhaps in 2001 when I moved down to JB. I was working then. The company gave me 2 weeks off as relocation leave ... to look for a house and to relocate. Meanwhile, I was able to stay in the hotel during this time. I remember bringing Mom and SM's maid with me .. the maid to clean and wash my house ... we stayed in Blue Wave.

The resort was quite impressive from the outside (as usual). I love the in build "waterfall" .... have always love the sound of water .. it makes the whole place cooling .... I did not know that there was lift available .. so I made Mom climb down 3 flight of stairway ... it was a challenge for her. But she said ... just consider it like an exercise ...

The room was a little small for me but the view that we get is pretty good - pretty scenic. As usual, the maintenance and service of this place is lousy. The front office gals are not well trained. The floor of the room was dirty .... my feet was black! Wondered when was the last time they mopped the floor.

I ordered for twin sharing and Mom suggested that we should phone CK to join us ... since there is enough beds to sleep on - 2 queen size beds. Faint! As if CK does not need to work and KL is just 30mins away!!! and I certainly do not want to share my bed !! :0 ...

We rested in the afternoon in the room - it was too hot too go out ... in the evening, we explored PD town .... its almost like Sitiawan .. small ... with The Store and Billion .... perhaps Sitiawan may be bigger .... we had dinner in Station Kopitiam ... Mom loves teh tarik and ordered her favorite beef rice. She finished the whole plate!

We were back in the hotel just in time for me to catch the sunset ... and I quickly clicked away ....

The aircon was turned to 27 since Mom is afraid of cold ... I slept like a dead log but Mom did not sleep well .... hahaha ... so much for sleeping in the hotel. She blame the beef rice -- too heaty ... but I would say that she miss her bed .... :0

In the morning, Mom was all set to go back. She showered at 6am, packed and all ready by 830am and woke me up. She loved the buffet breakfast and insisted that I should take photo of her standing next to the swimming pool! Ai ya ... wat else .. to show off la... but I have to say that Mom loves the camera! Hahhaha .... anyway ... we took quite a lot of shots ....

When we came home, Mom was so tired cos did not sleep well the night before ... she actually slept from 2-630pm!!!

Net2 .... it was quite an OK trip.... the only thing that I wish I could do was to walk along the beach ... and enjoy the breeze and sound of the waves ... didn't manage to do that as Mom cant walk too much. But the view from the room was good enough .... :0 ...

... Departure .... Are You Ready to Go? ...

The final week in TTC was a bit of a crazy week .... in fact, the final month was a crazy month .. I tell people ... i am like a packet of M&Ms ..... my emo is like M&Ms .. a mixture of all sorts of colors ... red ... blue ... yellow ... back .... brown .... represents all sorts of emotions .... its is indeed very hard to say good bye and bid farewell to people, friends .... place that we know and have grown to love ...

Anyway .. coming back to the final week in TTC .... I was suppose to clean, clear my room and pack up to leave ..... but instead .... I was just hang around .... dont feel like packing up .... cleaning or clearing .... I was biz going for farewell meals ... on top of it .... emo-land with "can love cannot marry mode" (as escapism perhaps ... :0) .... and off course Mom was with me ... had to entertain her bit ....

I was not alone because ..... I see that Ajeng was max playing around ... happy .... going round Spore like a tourist ..... Susanto ..... also was just hanging around .... of course he needed to clear his passport first .... Tu ... hahahha .... terror .... clear ... clean and pack all within 1 day and 1 night!!!!! And the mountain of his things!!!! Can faint what he stores in his little room in 3 years!! Some of us needs to go various places in Spore to bid farewell, grieve and do closures .....

In a way .... all of us struggle to pack up and move on .... packing up just means that we really need to leave ... forever .... so, we rather not to touch our things ... for as long as we can ...

Friends ... this is just packing up .. to leave a place that have been my home past 3 years .... my thoughts goes to leaving the earth for eternity ..... how would our response be when God says that it is time for us to leave this earth and go home to Him for eternally?

Physically, Aunty is her final journey here ... its really sad and heartbreaking to see her suffer .... she said that her time is not up yet .. she still has a lot of plans and dreams to achieve here ... how could it be so? What can we do to support her? We can only standby her support her in prayer ... that God in His mercies will be gracious to her and minister to her .... reveal His great plans to her ... best plans for her .....

Michelle said that through her experience as a medical doctor, she sees a trend that Christians seems to be the ones that struggles the most when comes to saying goodbye to this world ... be it the patient or the family ... and surprisingly, the Malays seems to be the easiest group.

The golden question is : how come? We all know that this world is not our home, we are just passing through ... we accept Jesus Christ because He is able to give us life, and life eternally .... we all know that heaven is where Jesus has gone to prepare our rooms for us .... a place where we do not need sun or moon because the glory of God gives it light .. the Lord Almighty lives in it .... its a city of pure gold .... like a transparent glass .... its a place where only people who's name is in the Book of Life goes to ... (Rev 21 : 11 - 27)

Indeed this is very ironic .... how come Christians preach so much about this heaven that we will go to eternally yet when it comes to go .... we dont want to go ....

I decided to asked Mom ... what does she think of this .... why its so hard for us to bid farewell and leave this earth when it our time is up? Mom's reply .... she says .... all of us are like guests on earth ... we are here to play ... passing through various stages of it and various places we will go and play .... but when its time for us to leave, we like children playing in our friend's house or in a playground, we would like and hope to play a little longer .... leaving earth means that we will never ever get to come back and play in this playground anymore .... its eternal ... and eternally be in heaven ... we have forever .... but not here on earth .... therefore, most of us would like to "play" a little longer .... be the guest of this "home" a little longer ... cos all of us have sort of like gotten use to this playground .... and like the playground and the people and friends that we have made in this playground .....

Make sense? Yea .... I guess so .... human beings are creatures of habitats ....once we have made a place our "home"or"hiding place" ... we develop feelings and attachment to it that it is so hard for us to let go .. we are short sighted ... we can only see what is in front of us but not beyond ....

I pray that when the day comes for me to bid farewell eternally ... at any point of my journey here, I will always be ready and able to echo Paul's words and say with gladness and peace in my heart that " .. I am already being poured out like a drink offering, and the time has come for my departure. I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith." (2 Tim 4:6-7)

Guess this is tent living that God has been trying to ingrain in me ... teach me over and over again for the past 20 years .... like Abraham, we are pilgrims on this earth .... and God will tell us to take down our tents, pack up and leave our familiar grounds ... to places that He will show and bring us .... for a reason and purpose that He will reveal to us if we ask Him ....

So ... I need to tell myself .... no need so susah hati .... God will provide a new tent for me and furnish my tent with the things that I need..... within a month as I go down to JB next week .... look at the bigger picture .... God's overall picture for my life ....

... Here I Am Lord ....

Today is a special day. 40 years ago in a little town of Sitiawan, a place called Chinese Maternity Hospital ... a baby gal was born at 1053am ... sadly, at 130pm, her maternal grandmother died on the same day ..... it was told that her father actually pillion the 9mths pregnant mother on his special Benz across Padang Astaka to the hospital ..... today that little girl is 40 ...

Yes la .... m 40 this year ... last Dec in my silent retreat, I learn to appreciate my birthdays and said that I must allow myself to celebrate the birth of my existence .... :0 ....

I woke up on this special morning with this song in my heart and :

I, the Lord of sea and sky,
I have heard My people cry.
All who dwell in dark and sin,
My hand will save.

I who made the stars of night,
I will make their darkness bright.
Who will bear My light to them?

Whom shall I send?

Here I am Lord, Is it I Lord?

I have heard You calling in the night.
I will go Lord, if You lead me.
I will hold Your people in my heart.

I, the Lord of sno
w and rain,
I have born my peoples pain.
I have wept for love of them, They turn away.
I will break their hearts of stone,
Give them hearts for love
I will speak My word to them,

Whom shall I send?

Here I am Lord, Is it I Lord?
I have heard You calling in the night.

I will go Lord, if You lead me.
I will hold Your people in my heart.

I, the Lord of wind and flame,
I will tend the poo
r and lame.
I will set a feast for them,
My hand will save

Finest bread I will provide,
Till their hearts be satisfied.
I will give My life to them,
Whom shall I se

Here I am Lord, Is it I Lord?

I have heard You calling in the night.
I will go Lord, if
You lead me.
I will hold Your people in my heart.

And I recall my calling .... He called me with this song in MYF camp when I was 18years old and I responded to the call ......

He reminded me of my calling in a silent retreat in PD 9 years ago through this song again .....

And in the Grad Retreat, He reminded me of my call through this song again .... just as I prepare myself to step out into His call for my life ....

During the Graduation Dinner .... our class stood up and sang this song with all our heart ... giving our pledge to the call that we have heard ..... yes .... we will go Lord, if You lead us ... we pledge to hold Your people in our hearts .....

Today, as I wake up ..... I hear my call ringing in my ear again ... yes .... it is time for me to go ... to step in ... to be used by Him .... as a tool .... vessel to reach and touch .... to carry the light ... bringing food to the hungry .... water to the thirsty .... to be the agent of change, life and hope to this broken world ....

With my call, the words that was shared by Bishop during our retreat in Ubin comes clearly to my mind ..... on 15 May 2010 .... when I step out to receive the scroll of my training in TTC, my identity changed when I receive the scroll .... I am no longer a daughter .... a sister .... an aunty ... but I am a servant of God first ..... that is my primary identity tagged with my call and scroll .... as I step in .... just like how King David was called to be the king of God's nation first and not the father to Absalom. When King David mourn 2 Samuel 18:33 but in 2 Samuel 19:5-7, Joab, his chief army ... rebuke and reminded him that his primary call and identity is the head of the nation ....

There is always a price tagged to our call .... much is given .... much will be demanded .... God cannot use a man that He has not break .....

We all have our cross to carry .... are you willing to carry it? All of us have a special call in our lives ... God has a plan and purpose for each of us .... that's our call ... do you know what is yours? Are you willing to say yes .... here I am Lord .... I will go (no matter where and no matter what) if You lead me .....